Catholic Generosity

Catholics are very giving people. They're always freely giving something, marking important events with gifts and significance in various ways. Rosaries in particular seem to be a currency of spiritual generosity - once I watched a priest friend give away a rosary he got from the Pope to a complete pagan academic, who was trying rather lamely to lead a religious discussion at a university, and realizing he was in over his head, surrounded by people of a profound faith he knew nothing about.

I'll never have to buy a Rosary - I've been given four of them. One of them is mother-of-pearl, was blessed by JPII, and that's my favorite. Then when one of my mentors saw it, he got all choked up and kept saying, "it's beautiful, it's beautiful."

I knew I was having a "Catholic moment" where I was supposed to give it to him, but I just couldn't do it. My cold, black, stingy little heart squawked like a 2-year-old inside, "MINE!" I have Scottish WASPy cheapo running in my blood.

I felt like a jerk. So finally, I compromised.

I went back to my generous Catholic mama, who had given me two of my rosaries, including this particular one. I told her the story, told her what a selfish pig I was, and asked her if she could help me redeem myself by giving me another one from JPII, since I knew she had a few that were given to her by a priest who knew him.

She laughed at me and gave me her last one. Her last one.

These people give me books, give me pamphlets, offer their homes, take me to dinner...they fill the church with hundreds of dollars of flowers every single day (the florist says, "There's more than one way to catch a fish, and beauty is one of them!"), and the place is always pristine and gorgeous. One borrowed a CD from me, and in the envelope when she returned it was tucked a gorgeous red rose. I need to learn that generosity and thoughtfulness and freedom of giving things away, instead of hoarding them. I did give that red rose away, much as I wanted to keep it - to a woman at the church who was hurting.

The same dear Catholic mama who gave me the rosaries had another one up her sleeve. Knowing that I'd gone through a really hard time recently, she called me up and treated me to dinner in a really nice restaurant, where we ate like kings til we felt sick afterward. Later that night we met up at the church to pray together for our usual weekly routine. We were talking with some other guy about the ugly new icon mysteriously replacing the much-loved Polish Divine Mercy painting, and I joked that if the Polish priest was the one who had replaced it, I'd go and "let him have it." Catherine misunderstood me and protested with a confession, "You can't go buying another one, I already GOT you one! I have it framed already!"

I was so touched and yet I laughed at the same time. That darling had gone and bought me a copy of that painting, had it framed and was saving it for my confirmation. But then I had a disconcerting thought - I knew that another "mama," Bridget, had asked to do the same thing for my confirmation. I am in trouble now!

I may just end up with one of them in my bedroom and another in the living room... They're going to make a real Catholic kitsch out of me yet. But at least I'll be on my way to learning generosity.